Very very VERY quick post.
This is not going to be a typical blog post that I would post, one because it is midnight and I should be sleep and two because I am just going to pour some feelings out.
Feelings are a weird concept to me.. I don't understand them at all. Not like physical feelings like sadness and sickness (although those are weird too) but rather liking someone.
Now I've had a stupid crush on the same guy for a while now, fading in and out my whole high school career.. It seems as if I'm in the friend zone and can't get out. Probably won't. But its weird to think that a certain person can hold your interest for that long, but doesn't even have the same feelings in return, right? I just do not get how I haven't moved on from this guy, like I want to but it just seems as though he just draws me back in.
I look back at the pictures we have taken over the years and I just get a goofy smile on my face, and I daydream about what it would be like to be with him.. Always hoping that one day it will happen.
I am up this late doing that exact thing. Looking at pictures, daydreaming (if you can even call it that) and reminiscing on certain memories... and I am smiling. I have a love/hate relationship right now with it.
But most importantly I am thinking that it is okay to have this "stupid crush" because it just reminds me that I am a normal human, and I am going to want things I can't have.. And I am just going to have to live with it. This comes with a lot of things in life, and I know that I am just beginning to experience it, seeing as I am a college freshman this year. (annnnnd I'm pretty sure I am going to see a lot more of this guy.)
In the end, I am just going to have to deal with these feelings, because it looks as if they aren't going away anytime soon. But I'm okay with that(: